Fly Me to the Moon

You know how sometimes, a girl just catches your eye, because of what she's wearing, and you just can't take your eyes off of her?

Well, just the other day, a girl caught my eye, because of what she was wearing, and I just couldn't take my eyes off of her... feet!

It wasn't because she was attractive or anything or because she was wearing a pair of killer pumps. No. It was more because this girl was wearing boots which I thought resembled the kind ASTRONAUTS use to walk on the moon.

So I managed to get a closer look, and lo and behold, they were called Moon Boots!

All I have to say about that is wow. Just wow.

I'm back!

Seriously.

After a long absence, almost 2+ years of doing things like making face time with people, I'm finally back.

This has been a long time coming.

Stay tuned...

Brasileiro

October 7, 2006. This is not today's date. This is the date that Sergio Mendes will be playing Toronto and today I bought some great tickets. In case you don't know, his music "blends the urban cultures of Brazil and America, hip hop culture, samba and bossa nova." If you've never listened to this music before, it's time to broaden your musical tastes. Give it a listen.

If you have nothing nice to say...

Man, words hurt.

I won't say what. I won't say where. Not even why or who I hurt. But it just sucks when you say things without thinking and they're interpreted MUCH differently than what you initially intended.

If the world was full of women, and armies were all women, you could win a war just by the words you say. Say a few mean words, make the whole army cry, and the war is over! I guess that's why people say "let's talk about this" rather than get involved in a fight or something. Because words hurt so much more. You can inflict so much pain.

In this case, I'm an extremely deadly assassin, and I didn't even know it.

The mouth is equivalent to a loaded weapon...watch out!

/end rant

The cup is half full.

So lately, I've gotten into a somewhat heated message board argument over the merits of the Toronto Raptors selecting Andrea Bargnani with the first overall pick in the 2006 NBA draft. The person I've been arguing against seems to be a pessimist, since nothing the Raptors are doing appear to show any promise. I, on the other hand, am the optimist. With this pick, the Raptors are laying the foundation for an entertaining and competitive team. You can't help but look forward to the upcoming season. Also, Bryan Colangelo, with his moves, has suddenly given the Raptors and International identity that matches the city they're located in.

In any case, this optimist vs. pessimist thing got me thinking about a joke I heard way back when I was in elementary school. How I remember that, I have no idea, but I'd like to share it:

"A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. If one felt it was too hot, the other thought it was too cold. If one said the TV was too loud, the other claimed the volume needed to be turned up. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, the other a doom and gloom pessimist.

"Just to see what would happen, on the twins' birthday their father loaded the pessimist's room with every imaginable toy and game. The optimist's room he loaded with horse manure. That night the father passed by the pessimist's room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly. "Why are you crying?" the father asked. "Because my friends will be jealous, I'll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I'll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken." answered the pessimist twin. Passing the optimist twin's room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure. "What are you so happy about?" he asked. To which his optimist twin replied, 'There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!'"

Now, I may be an optimist, but not nearly to the level of the optimist twin. If someone gave me a pile of horse shit for Christmas, I'd give them the classic WTF look and then who knows what I'd do?!

However, when you have a positive outlook on things, things always do look a lot better.

"Now all restaurants are Taco Bell"

Imagine those famous words that Lt. Lenina Huxley told John Spartan in Demolition Man were true. Imagine that all restaurants were now Taco Bell. What do you think would happen?

• Perhaps global warming would be accelerated due to massive global farting.

• Perhaps there wouldn't be any threat of bird flu in the world, since everyone would be eating tacos, burritos, quasedillas and supreme fries; instead of eating bird flu inducing animals.

• Perhaps my Mexican food cravings would go away. *

Imagine that.

*Note: I did in fact go to Taco Bell for dinner today after several years of avoidance, and I must admit, it was quite delicious.

It's a bird, It's a plane...

WRONG! It's a speeding minivan trying to overtake you in the fast lane.

I don't know what it is. Perhaps it's the frustration of having so many kids; the frustration of having to settle for a minivan instead of a sports car; the frustration of having to drive the kids to school or soccer practice.

People who drive minivans seem to be the most consistently aggressive drivers on the road. There may be people in other vehicles that like to swerve in and out of traffic, change lanes without signalling, cut you off, or even tailgate you to the point they're literally bumper to bumper; but the next time this happens, take a closer look and you'll notice it's probably a minivan.

Minivans = Instant road rage